Written by Frogmarsh Peterson
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Topics: Politics, Government

Wednesday, 12 November 2003

image for Kiddies go to the toy... ballot?
Hand-painted for democracy

In an effort to make politics more interesting to young people, the government has commisioned ten figurines of well known, but mostly unknown politicians.

Politicians available to buy include:
Tony Blair (he the prym minista),
John Prescott (the one that punched the other guy),
Jack Straw (erm... ask Mummy and Daddy),
Ian Duncan Smith (oh wait, they stopped making that one),
That Tory one,
That one with the... erm... hair,
some guy.

PM Blair was asked what he thought of the move: "We hope that children will play with these new 'action politicians' and then perhaps say 'Mummy, Daddy which one is this?'."

The Government hope that a collaberation between toy maker and parent will send young people's voter apathy into the darkness of history.

Liberal Democrat Charles Kennedy asked: "what is the point of this when children can't vote anyway?" His comments were snubbed by real politicians accusing him of fuzzy liberal thinking.

The figurines have already gone on sale at three test sites including an oil rig in the north sea, the Isle of Man and Chesney Dippit's Figurine and Porcelain Boudoir, Smuckton, somewhere rural.

Ditherers Toy Kumpani say that if the placcy statesmen prove popular then they'll go nationwide!

The scheme has also received attention from Washington . It's reported that the Republican party want Republican candidates to feature in a whole host of childrens products.
President Bush had this to say:
"...why shouldn't kids have GOP folks in their toy chests... and on their wall paper? (smirk) ... we wants educated kids in this... in this country of ours. Kids that know that voting republican is the only way to get santy klaus's's love."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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