Written by Joe Leff
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Topics: Gateshead

Monday, 25 February 2013

A washing machine was seen shuffling along a street in Gateshead yesterday.

Apparently, it had been over-filled with an unbalanced load of clothes, and began vibrating madly during the spin cycle before jigging along the kitchen floor and out of the open front door of the house.

After it disconnected itself from the power supply, the machine's vibrating momentum kept it going down the steep pathway to the main street.

The washing machine stopped just outside the bus shelter, where several people began to queue with their bags of laundry, hoping for a free wash.

Dr Ben Dix, a local expert, reckoned that "modern washing machines have an increased tendency for 'oscillatory walking', especially if incorrectly loaded."

This particular washing machine has already threatened to escape from the kitchen several times before yesterday's adventure.

Mrs Eva Nuthalode, who owns the washing machine, said she doesn't want it back anymore. "It's much more peaceful in our kitchen now. And we're just going to wear disposable clothes."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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