Written by John_L
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Monday, 3 December 2012

image for Papers vie for first photo of Royal Baby
An Ultrasound, Not Kate's.

St James Palace announced today that Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge is expecting her first child. Although at the moment she is in the King Edward hospital suffering from acute morning sickness.

David Cameron welcomed the news saying "It will be great for the whole nation, a Royal baby will distract the people from the fact that we have not managed to do anything about the deficit and are putting up taxes for lower and middle income families, in part to pay for the Royals."

Meanwhile tabloids around the world are vying to be the first to get a pre natal photo of a Royal. David Summers of News International: "We got beaten to the photo's of Kate's baps but we have staked out every hospital in the UK already to see about getting a photo of her Ultrasound Scan."

Meanwhile Peter Black of Mirror group said "We have three people trained to use an endoscope with a camera on. We are hoping that one or all of them will be employed at the Royal Palaces and have access to use this to snap the Royal baby in the womb."

"We got the topless Kate first so we will want to keep up out Kate firsts." A spokesman for Closer Magazine told us." We already have a trained man in place at the King Edward Hospital ready to trick Kate into a CT scanner so we can get the first images of the little one."

Meanwhile Prince Harry who is serving in Afghanistan was a little upset that he could only toast the baby with Waad a non alcoholic fizzy pomegranate drink. Due to an agreement early this year that British bases in the country would no longer serve alcohol in the country.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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