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Sunday, 16 September 2012

image for Never Mind Pippa's Ass, Get a Load of Kate's Tits!
Pippa Middleclass and her talented ass

Every year the town of Dorking plays host to a very special talent contest - Dorking's Pets Have Got Talent, is a contest to find some of the most talented pets in the Dorking area.

Last year the top prize went to local girl Pippa Middleclass and her incredibly talented donkey (or ass if you prefer) Bottom, whom she named after the character in the William Shakeyspear Musical, A Midsomer Nights Murders. The reason Pippa's Bottom is so talented is because she has trained it to fart the Wedding March by Felix Mendelsshon. Pippa's ass scooped first prize in the competition and went on to international acclaim, becoming the darling of the tabloid press for several months.

However, this year she faces some stiff competition from her younger sister Kate Middleclass who has some incredibly talented Tits. That's right, young Katie has spent the last six months training a pair of great of Great Tits to do spectacular ariel displays.

Competition organiser Anthony Letch described the performance, "One travels in a clockwise direction, whilst the other in a counter clockwise direction, both are carrying coloured tassels. They really are a fantastic pair of tits! We can't wait till competition day to see the tits in all their glory."

Sadly, not everyone has entered into the spirit of the competition, a French newspaper has obtained secret footage of Kate's tits in action and published the footage on its website.

More as we have it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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