Written by Joe Leff
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Tuesday, 4 September 2012

This summer has seen an increase in potential buyers searching the market for a comb of their own. The increase has been driven by a wave of university graduates trying to improve their hair care and hair styles - often with their parents' help, a recent report suggests.

Around 27 per cent of those planning to buy a comb in the next 12 months will be doing so for the first time.

Sally (22) and Tony (24) have been renting a comb for 18 months. "It will be so nice to have a comb of our own," said Sally. "Mum and Dad have been nagging us for years to buy one. The one we've chosen is a bit more expensive than we can afford, but Mum and Dad are helping us with the deposit, because they are getting fed up with us borrowing their holiday comb every weekend."

Combs in the South East tend to be more expensive than up North, so many young couples are moving to places where they'll be able to share their own comb together.

Unfortunately, some couples have split up before they could share their own comb. Such partings are likely to increase, since not enough new combs are available at the lower end of the market.

With higher salaries and everything in full flow, many upwardly-mobile comb-owners are having extensions to their combs - or even a country comb as a special treat.

Those couples with high-income double salaries and no children typically have the nicest combs. "Ugh - imagine having to share your comb with little kids," said Mr & Mrs Weirwelloff, of High Wycombe. "Just think of all those nits and stuff. We've worked hard for our beautiful new comb - and we don't want it ruined by snotty-nosed kids."

But after middle-age, some couples are downsizing to smaller combs - especially with the onset of receding hair lines.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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