Written by Quentin Muffin
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Friday, 27 July 2012

One of the first events of the London Olympic games nearly ended before it started after a hilarious mix up with the Korean flag; apparently they have two.

The North Korean women's team walked off after a video introducing their players showed the South Korean flag. The mix up caused a bit of a rumpus and they refused to play but eventually returned to the pitch to win in front of an enthusiastic crowd of fifteen. Fortunately, David Cameron, managed to cool political tempers by apologizing to the team saying "I'm really, really, really sorry but it was a honest mistake that was honestly made, honestly."

Our researchers are looking into the background of Korean politics and, after a bit of googling, we can reliably inform you that there is a bit of bad feeling between the peoples of the North and South of the country. We could not ascertain the cause of the 'Korean tiff' but our history specialist is ploughing through episodes of the documentary M.A.S.H and said "It's early days yet but as far as I can make out it all seems to have blown up over a sexual triage that involved a transvestite, a hot-lipped nurse and some bloke called Hawkeye."

Talking about North-South divisions, the match was a BBC Scotland production and a spokeswoman said "It's nae oor fault we were sent the video frae London. The sassenachs hae stitched us up agin," Nevertheless, Scottish President, Alex Salmond, got behind the whole British team by sending a good luck message to the 'Scolympians'. He said: "You join an elite band of Scottish sporting heroes, from Sir Chris Hoy's record breaking four gold medals to - er - Sir Chris Hoy's record breaking four gold medals. We are proud of the Scottish talent hailing from our shores." Lord Coe thanked him for his stirring words and, with an obvious reference to Korea, praised him on his unbiased, non-partisan speech.

Meanwhile, the BBC is sending an all-expenses paid delegation of ten people each to every country that is participating in the event to study the flags and ensure such a mistake doesn't happen again. We caught up with Mark Thompson, BBC Director General and part of the South East Asia delegation, on a paradise beach in Bali. We asked him why, when Bali isn't represented in the Olympics, that he was there. In reply he held up the flag and said, "look at all the pretty colours".

Breaking news: We tracked down the BBC employee in London who created the video. "I don't know how I could have made the mistake. still, no harm done" said Lee Myung-Bak, with a smirk.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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