Written by IainB
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Wednesday, 27 June 2012

image for Dangerous drivers to get an unusual punishment
Take that corner carefully!

The Department For Road And Transport have come up with an unusual way of punishing dangerous drivers, in an attempt to rehabilitate them.

"Simply fining and locking up dangerous drivers does not alter their driving style," Mike Penning, minister for Transport in the UK. "We needed to come up with a way of helping them to become safer drivers."

The new scheme, called Eggs on the Dash, is to be piloted in Penning's home constituency of Hemel Hempstead.

"It's a very simple scheme," said Penning. "If you are caught dangerous driving, you are given half a dozen raw eggs. These eggs are balanced on the dashboard of the driver's car, next to the windscreen."

It does not take many eggs to roll off and make a terrible mess inside the car for the drivers to become more careful.

"Accelerating like you're attempting to take off, cornering as though you are on rails, slamming on the brakes, these all cause the eggs to roll off the dash and hit the car, or better yet, the driver," said Penning. "After a few miles, drivers quickly learn to drive more slowly, corner and stop more sensibly, and leave plenty of space between them and the car in front. It's remarkable."

There are a couple of problems with the scheme, which Penning hopes will be ironed out during the pilot.

"Obviously, we cannot punish motorcyclists with the same scheme," he said. "Additionally, having a ready supply of ammo has led to me being pelted by raw eggs when previously caught drivers see me in the street."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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