The England football team are getting ready to face the Italians in the European Championship with exclusive videos of Italian Manchester City star Ben Mussolini which give them the lowdown on his exploits.
Wayne Rooney admits that Musso was a thorn in the flesh of every team he played against in the Premiership last season, but he confirmed that England would be ready for the Germans after hanging Muso upside down on the goalposts.
With the country in need of a boost after all the bad weather it is hoped that economic worries will disappear as the English triumph in Europe.
David Cameron told a rally of demented political journalists that he had spoken to his friend Roy Hodgson and he expected every Englishman would do his duty.
'With Cameron behind us we can hardly fail to score' said our Roy who expects a knighthood in the next Cabinet reshuffle.