Written by queen mudder
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Topics: London, Washington

Saturday, 20 May 2006

image for Euan Blair quarantined in London
Back to London with his tail between his legs...

London, Saturday 20 May 2006 - (Associated Mess): Tony Blair's eldest son Euan has left his Washington DC internship abruptly and returned back to London for a reported six months period of quarantine and convalescence after compulsory NHS anti-rabies innoculations failed during a double date with Bush twins Barbara and Jenna.

A spokesman for the Republican stink tank that sponsored his internship noted that the Prime Minister's son had begun "foaming at the mouth and howling like a Rottweiler" after the twins had reportedly snogged him under the Lincoln Memorial during a night lit by the full moon.

When the symptoms got worse and the evening deteriorated into a full-blown diplomatic seizure, the Secret Service was called in and young Blair was taken away by ambulance to a medical isolation facility where tests showed he had developed a curious allergy to Bush-dynasty bodily fluids:

"It was as if he had suddenly developed elephantisis of the gonads", said a hospital spokesman. "It may be a freak reaction but we've seen isolated reactions like this before in one or two kids who have been kissed by the President himself during the 2000 and 2004 White House election campaign tours.

"Clearly, there is some sort of allergic reaction that mainfests whenever Bush family saliva comes into contact with similar species-members."

Blair's internship sponsors were said to be "devastated" that such a promising young specimen had suddenly been taken ill and would be unable to complete his full induction course in the US.

He had been due to remain for at least another six months to complete his assigment with the Presidential guru Karl Rove, where he was taking instruction in the arcane Skull 'N' Bones arts of arse-licking and sycophancy.

Some sources on Capitol Hill have claimed that before the Bush twins incident , young Euan had not fitted into the orifice of a senior DC Congressman.

Other reports had stated that he had seemed curiously uninterested and "bored" in the notoriously tedious duties of an intern and had seemed geniunely shocked that the standards set in the mid-1990s by internship standard-bearer Monica Lewinsky had left him "high and dry".

Republicans wryly noted that Mr Blair had spent three months with the now-jailed DC lobbyist Jack Abramoff and that nothing untoward had ever happened.

A spokesman for No 10 Downing Street has said that: "Euan had to cut short his internship because of a severe Contra indication to Foreign Office standard-issue immunizations against cholera, rabies and sycophancy.

"He thoroughly enjoyed his time in both orifices and is extremely grateful for the experiences he had in Washington AC/DC."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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