Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: falklands

Thursday, 14 June 2012

image for Falklands War Over: Official
Argentina, Galtieri, Maradonna, Handball, Madonna, Peron - it's a big circle, isn't it?

The Falklands War will be declared "officially over" later today after 30 years of conflict with Argentina, with services at Port Stanley's cathedral and Liberation Monument.

Britain liberated the UK territory from Argentinian occupation on 14 June 1982, but the war has been "simmering on" ever since, and the Argentinian side never accepted defeat, despite total annihilation on the battlefield.

Prime Minister David Cameron issued a message saying Britain's support for the islands had "not wavered in the last 30 years and it will not in the years ahead".

Unless its rich supply of mineral resources dries up, that is.

Argentina has always claimed sovereignty over the islands and has recently taken out UK adverts urging negotiations on the future of, what they call, the Malvinas.

The liberation took only 74 days, but a stubborn refusal to give in has led to 30 years of argunent, pouting and stamping of feet by the South Americans, whose leader at the time, the unfortunate General Leopoldo Fortunato Galtieri, said:

"It was never handball, that!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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