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Monday, 4 June 2012

image for Queen's Diamond Jubilee Celebrations: Man admits 'I'm going slightly mad'
Mr Garger dropped his headphones when jumping on his bike

A man was admitted to hospital today after going slightly mad because of the blanket media coverage of the four day Queens Diamond Jubilee celebrations.

The man, Ray Di O'Garger, of Italian-Irish descent told reporters:

"On saturday I read about the Queen having A Day at the races, but the next day I was lazing on a sunday afternoon and I turned the wireless on and they were talking about the 'Diamond Jubilee'. All of a sudden I've seen stormtrooper in stillettos, I'm knitting with only one needle".

After being rushed to the local A&E doctors diagnosed him with a cute Queen fever. After being given medication and discharged Mr Garger explained further
"All the Jubilee stuff made me go radio gaga, I felt under pressure, its a hard life, I just want to break free, I want to ride my bicycle, don't stop me now I'm having such a good time..."

With that, Garger and his friend The Invisible Man jumped on his invisible bicycle made for two and rode off into the sunset.

People took to twitter to offer support, while other made fun of him.

@InchcockG remarked 'Another One Bites The Dust' @HerMajTQ said 'Say its not true' SouthendSnooper tweeted 'The show must go on'

LATEST: Mr Garger was spotted outside Buckingham Palace in the last half an hour trying to get tickets for the concert in The Mall featuring Elton John, Paul McCartney, Stevie Wonder and Kylie Minogue. Onlookers told Sly news he was singing 'I'm a racing car passing by like Lady Godiva, I'm gonna go go go - There's no stopping me'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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