Written by asphyxiation
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Saturday, 2 June 2012

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Flea Ridden Overweight Tom Cat

Mad Mayor Of Olde London TownJorris Bohnson has taken a leaf from Dr Zoigbergs famous children's book "Prat In A Cat" and started wearing a large overweight Ginger Tom on his head to official functions.

The overweight tom cat Jorris, well known for his late night shenanigans, first aired his now famous attire at the official opening of a new speed camera, situated just outside his plush Belgravia apartments.

Jorris's cat, the out of work entertainer Slagpuss, was recently fired from the BBC for refusing to move to its new headquarters on CBeebies. He is said to be catatonic at having to escort the mad mayor to various cheese and wine parties.

In a recent appearance as guest host on the popular catirical quiz 'Have I Cat Meows For You' ,|Mad Jorris outraged fellow panellists, Ian Catslop and Pull Curtain by making far too many cat related puns in one show.

The new look Jorris has attracted many critics, in particular his onetime political sparring partner, Mr. 'I Presume' Livingstone, who said:"What a dickhead! Totally out of touch with public opinion. You'd think he'd had enough pussy by now, without rubbing the publics and his own nose in it."

Defending the new look headgear, Jorris stated: "Bibbledy Bobble", proving that he really is 'As Mad As A Catter'.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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