Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 19 May 2012

image for 'Mayan Calendar' crop circle or Aztec Roulette Wheel?
Advanced alien 'cookie cutter' technology etched the Aztec Roulette Wheel apparently

London - Ufologists fighting for a share of the lucrative Gemini Solar Eclipse prediction market centered on Sunday night's occultation are having none of it, of course.

They're siding with Mexican cereologist Jamie Maussan's claims that the 2004 UK field etching is a classic Mayan Calendar design.

However one of Friday's diamond jubilee lunch visitors who sneaked a surreptitious snap of an ancient stained glass window at Windsor Castle's Hellfire Club Chapel is adamant the theory 'is just plain wrong'.

His pic - taken by a concealed camera inside an unnamed Commonwealth consort's tiara - shows the 12th century lead-and-light window depicting a replica of the earliest recorded Aztec Roulette Wheel.

And the position of the 'roulette ball' corresponds exactly with the crop circle's slot designating astrology's 2012 Gemini solar eclipse position.

Maussan has been quoted as saying his Mayan Calendar crop circle theory suggests 'some kind of pivotal event for humanity...between 20 May and 6 June 2012' according to UFO websites monitoring the UK's notorious field etchings.

This weekend a London-based Professor of Cosmic Symbolism who has studied both the crop circle and the Hellfire Club Chapel window in detail is narrowing down the prediction to just one world-shattering event.

"Smart money's on the Gemini solar eclipse coinciding with the death of Queen Elizabeth II," Professor Sir Waldo Perigee, GCMG, GCHQ, GBH etc, etc, said today.

"The ensuing chaos should last until the eclipsed Fool Moon of Monday 4th June," Perigee added, "by which time 99% of the faux House of Windsor should be behind bars at HMP Belmarsh.

"Wanna see footage of the Aztec UFO hangar that crafted the 2004 Wiltshire crop circle?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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