Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 9 May 2012

image for Prince Philip's Lindsay Lohan-style ankle bracelet slips during Queen's Speech
I'll wipe my arse on anyone I want to

London - There were red faces at the Palace of Westmonster today as an Anti-Social Behavior Order electronic tag worn by the Duke of Edinburgh was seen by millions on live TV.

Apparently he got it for a racist rant at some Palace underling paid next to nothing to wipe the royal bum.

Under normal circumstances such lowly serfs would have done absolutely nothing until it emerged it was 'no ordinary lackey' but President Obama during last year's State Visit.

"Apparently Michelle caught the whole sordid incident on her cell phone video cam," a constitutional expert commented this afternoon.

"She totally did her nut at the insult to her man."

A secret session at Barking Magistrates soon slapped an ASBO and tagged the racist old thug for at least three years.

This morning's Queen Speech sighting confirms Philip as the nation's top thug.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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