Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 18 April 2012

image for Knights Templar fury at Anders Breivik slur
Jacques de Molay would have had the upstart whorsewhipped

London - In a spooky echo reminiscent of 'He's not the Messiah, he's just a very naughty little boy' a direct descendant of Knights Templar Grand Master Jacques de Molay has hit out over daft 'sacred initiation' claims by accused Norwegian mass murderer Anders Brevik.

"What's more he's not just yer average Nordic neo-fascist extremist killer, either," Mrs Hildegarde Ratzinger de Molay said today, "he's another one of the bloody Polish Pope's sons, innit."

Mrs de Molay, a direct descendant of the 13th century Knights Templar boss immortalised on the famous Shroud of Turin forgery, is livid at Brevik's claims of induction into the Order's secret London chapter, aka the Hellfire Club.

"The story's total bollox," de Molay explained, "and probably originates from the same rubbish sauces.

"Besides, Brevik was banned from all Temple contact after bouncing a subscription check back in 1999.

"Wanna see naked pix of him at Pope Karol Wojtyla's 80th birthday bash?

"Nah, on second thoughts, spare yourselves the inevitable therapy fees, this guy really sucks even though his Pa was Da Pontiff."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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