Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 7 April 2012

image for NATO hero thwarted Thatcher's attempt to nuke Buenos Aires
Labour MP Dennis Healey slammed the old hag as 'glorying in slaughter'

London - A top NATO intelligence official forcibly prevented Mrs Thatcher from nuking the hell out of Buenos Aires during the Falklands conflict according to classified defence papers to be published next week.

The documents describe the Downing Street intervention when a punch-drunk Mrs T was 'high as a kite' following the May 2 1982 sinking of the General Belgrano.

Eyewitness records relate how the Argies' May 4th revenge sinking of the Royal Navy's HMS Sheffield in a lethal Exocet missile strike saw the PM reach for the 'big bang button' inside her special handbag.

This would have sent an automatic signal to Hellfire Club love interest President Ronnnie Raygun to launch an immediate nuclear
attack on the Argentine capital of Buenos Aires.

However the 11th hour intervention by NATO special ops commander - and former Olympic wrestling gold medal champ - General Sir Monty Dambusta VC & Bar saw her held in a series of strangle holds that effectively emasculated the dastardly plot.

Sir Monty was later decorated for the daring move, the bravery citation noting how his successful Cobra Clutch - a technical wrestling term for a one-armed Half (Admiral) Nelson hold - easily overpowered the whisky-sozzled Prime Monster.

MoD officials were so impressed by Sir Monty's nifty grab that they subsequently named the Government's top security briefing committee COBRA, a moniker that remains to this very day.

As for President Reagan his willingness to aid and abet what would have been the obliteration of the Argentine capital and its two million residents has been carefully erased from public screwtiny.

Expert bombing advice from Nancy Reagan's tarot reader predicting the strike was subsequently put down to an attack of psychic indigestion.

Expect to see the declassified papers published early next week.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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