Written by birbee
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Tuesday, 28 February 2012

image for Protesters Evicted from St Paul's Cathedral
They're Gone.............

Last Night There Were Hundreds of Them, This Morning They are Gone. The protesters camping on the steps of St Paul's Cathedral awoke this morning to find their tents had disappeared.

Confusion reigned for a short time as the dirty unkempt tax-dodging bunch of wannabe anarchists tried to fathom out what had happened to what has been their pop-up living quarters since they started their alleged protest against rich people, on the steps of a church, on October 15 2011.

Before long, however, many of the now homeless vagrants stumbled across pictures of the removed camping accommodation surfing the internet on their smart phones whilst enjoying a Chocca Mocha Skinny Latte-cino in the Paternoster Square branch of a well known local yuppie coffee house.

It transpires that the bailiffs had quietly removed all serviceable equipment during the midnight hour and it was all now advertised on E-Bay, the popular web-based auction site, to raise funds for this years Bailiff's Ball.

A spokesperson for the National Bailiff's Association, frequently mistaken for a bunch of American Basketball players, claimed they had not done anything wrong and they had vaguely followed the letter of the law. The spokesperson also confirmed that the timing of the raid was particularly advantageous as E-Bay were currently offering a "no-insertion fee" offer on all biddable items.

The protesters have been reported, off the record, as claiming they would be launching several fund-raising activities to raise enough capital to place bids for the recovery of the items.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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