Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 1 February 2012

image for Now the Pope may strip Fred Goodwin of his Vatican gong
Goodwin accused of over-egging that Jacques De Molay tortured look

London - The 'God's Banker Medal' (2nd Class) is in the personal gift of His Holiness and can be rescinded at the discharge of a beretta - er...dropping of a biretta! - the Pope's mouthpiece said today.

Typically recipients must show extraordinary service to pontifical coffers and/or outstanding banking nous benefitting the Congregation for the Doctoring - er...Doctrine! - of the Faith, ie. the Spanish Inquisition.

Goodwin received his gilt (sic) and bronze gong soon after elevation to a British knighthood by his estranged mother Queen Elizabeth II.

Today his reputation and the award itself lie in tatters as Vatican moves to strip him gather pace.

"Of course Fred can still remain an honorary Knight Templar is he keeps up the annual subscriptions," Papal factotum (sic) Monsignor Georg Gangswine commented today.

"However, someone must stop him from over-egging that martyred 'Jacques de Molay look' and destroy all reference to ancestral claims that his forbear modelled for the original Turin Shroud."

Tony Blair's own Papal knighthood could be next for the trashcan...unless the price is right.

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