A cunning ruse by Iain Duncan Smith was thwarted by the Conservative party today. The plan was uncovered when a Mrs Ivy Duncan Smyth was found to be running for Tory party leadership.
Upon closer inspection the mysterious woman was found to be Iain Duncan Smith in drag, having slightly modified his name to get a second shot at leadership. No-one in the Tory party had sussed his clever ploy, it was only when John Prescott started chatting him up in Westminster that the disguise was rumbled.
Mr Duncan Smith said, "Please, just give me a second shot, I'll do better this time, we'll beat Labour I'm sure. Aw, c'mon!"
John Prescott was said to still be interested in a date with Mrs Duncan Smyth. He said, "I'm lonely!"