Written by queen mudder
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Monday, 19 December 2011

image for 'Queen will be euthanised tomorrow' amid fears one in five of PM's 'problem families' lives in Buckingham Palace
Cameron has earmarked half a billion quid to deal with psychopathic problem families

London - A drop of hemlock in her bedtime Horlicks (sic) may be the preferred method to dispatch HM to the land of perpetual royal nod.

Secret deals between Palace courtiers and No 10 have picked tomorrow's Festival of Lights ceremonies to finally see off the Illuminati's problem Queen.

The ancient Hanukkah ritual of dousing the cuppa has roots in a 175BC rite initiated by someone called Antiochus IV Epiphanes.

The old despot was notorious for pandering to Hellenizing faction supporters - the latterday forbears of Philip The Greek.

Today those Hellenizing factions are bust and Greece teeters on the verge of bankruptcy - something that No 10 describes as typical of the House of Windsor itself.

A quick glance at the government guidelines for dysfunctional set-ups confirms key criteria identifying roots of the rot.

These include: no one is in work (as in Kate Middleton who's never had a job in her life); the family's income is low (royal gravy train handouts have been frozen); it has poor accommodation (Buckingham Palace is crumbling); no one has a qualification (apart from Wills and Harry who are certified crooks) and the mother has mental-health problems (psychotic delusions 'like she thinks she's Queen').

Camilla Fucker-Proles may also 'get a dose' - probably of organic strychnine from the Highgrove mixed border of borderline psychopathic remedies.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 plus 2?

2 5 1 4
60 readers are online right now!

Go to top