Written by j.w.
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Friday, 25 November 2011

image for Man Mown Down by Mobile Phone Users Imprisoned
Don't Stand in the way of Hstory!

John Windbag was sentenced to two years imprisonment after he lost his case against a number of irate mobile phone user(MPUs).

Walking down a busy street Windbag was musing about a joke he was thinking up when BANG - he was mown down by a group of MPUs busy saluting with a raised arm to their ears talking rapidly into mid air.

Windbag on complaining to the Police revealed that the MPUs had not even noticed his plight as they marched on talking away. But the Police told the distraught Windbag, that they were not amused.

'You weren't wearing a helmet' they declared 'it is your responsibility. To be without a helmet on the streets is against the law. You will be charged with upsetting the march of progress!'

Windbag whined that he had never heard of this law but to no avail. 'Ignorance is no excuse' he was told and when defending himself in court the Judge was unsympoathetic. 'It is people like you who are holding back history' he was told.

Windbag has reformed whilst in prison and has learnt to march around the jail with a mobile phone to his ear gabbling away.

His probation officer is very pleased with his progress and he was put forward for early release due to good behavious.

Unfortunately the Daily Mail got hold of his story and lambasted the Justice system for being soft on Windbag's criminal activity. So he will have to serve his full sentence.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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