Written by Sidney Bollocks
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 25 November 2011

image for New Crime Wave Spreads Across Britain
All that remains of Brighton Pier

As the European debt crises worsens and Britain's economic outlook gets bleaker by the day, a disturbing new crime wave has erupted across the nation.

What began with unscrupulous thieves stealing garden gates, television aerials and the lead from church roofs, in order to recover a paltry scrap metal value, the thefts have now escalated into something far bigger.

Police forces around the country are at a loss as to how these crimes have been perpetrated and have been left scratching their heads. Chief Inspector Bert Floggit from the Met told us, "The London Eye has disappeared overnight. All the thieves left were a few nuts and bolts. Nobody heard or saw a bloody thing. Heathrow police are still trying to locate a missing Airbus A380".

In East Sussex, Brighton police are seeking leads in the sudden disappearance of the world famous Brighton Pier. They would like to speak to the driver of a white Ford Transit van, which was seen in the area shortly before the disappearance.

In a worrying development, it would seem that the spate of thefts has now spread to Scotland, as police have reported that the Forth Bridge is nowhere to be found.

Concern overseas has resulted in French authorities throwing a security cordon around the Eiffel Tower, whilst Australia's Sydney Harbour is now under armed guard and closed to traffic and climbers.

Make Sidney Bollocks's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 3 multiplied by 1?

5 3 24 9

Go to top