The Levelheaded inquiry into media misdemeanours have issued an interim statement: 'The Media Must Pull Up Its Socks'.
The 'Sun' and 'Daily Mail' refused to print the statement as 'it had nothing to do with them'
The word is that media self-regulation should keep socks up so they don't fall offensively over shoes and get dirt on them. 'If you wash regularly and keep clean sheets' said Levelheaded 'you are duty bound to keep your socks up.'
The scandal of the media's dropping socks was revealed by an investigative reporter on the 'Guardian' who shocked the world with revelations about Rupert Murdoch actually walking into a meeting with oddly matched socks smelling of urine!
'I couldn't pull my socks up' Rupert complained 'because I was otherwise engaged listening to a phone call from my ace reporter who had recently been interviewing dying people in exclusive scoops.'
Levelheaded is meeting several well known personalities who are furious over sock scandals. They are thought to be ready to 'put the boot in'.
Rumours are spreading that several media tycoons might be putting their feet up shortly.