Written by queen mudder
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Thursday, 17 November 2011

image for Rebecca Brooks expecting 'alien' surrogate baby
The embryo was created at an ancient fertility site in the Southern England crop circle belt

London - The flame haired media hasbeen and her husband Charlie are to become parents in February after hiring a surrogate to gestate the sprog.

Reports today said the embryo had been implanted in a secret fertility facility close to the Wiltshire/Oxfordshire crop circle beltway near the couple's home.

The procedure was initially hailed a success but the foetus's twin sister died in utero just as a new batch of crop circles began menacing genetically modified rape seed oil fields near Alton Barnes.

Gynaecology sources said today there's now a 50-50 chance the baby will be born with a 'cosmic' cereal field etching birthmark somewhere on her body.

"That phoenenix-rising-from-the-ashes crop circle design could look very attractive indeed," Emeritius Professor of Cerealology Dr Einstein Flintstone said today, "equally the hummingbird or even the star burst.

"Take absolutely no notice of foolish detractors now betting on the 'ganja-pipe-smoking-alien-with-PMT' crop circle to make its birthmark debut on the poor babe's bot.

"Wanna see pix of the fertilization ceremony that secured Rebecca and Charlie's place in er, hystery?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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