Written by Premier wig
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Wednesday, 16 November 2011

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Security is tight

Security at the 2012 Olympics will be as tight as its ever been but experts have said they are training up tigers to deal with any major trouble makers.

"The eyes of the world will be on us and if we let trouble get out of hand we'll be the laughing stock of the whole world! We're taking no chances," Lord Seb (I ran in the olympics and everyone knows me) Coe said.

The secret location on the A24 near Worthing has been training the cats since London won the right to host the games in 2005.

"Yes it takes five to six years to train them and yes two of the trainers have been eaten but that wasn't the tigers fault. The first trainer forgot to feed them and the second one was caught literally with his trousers down. The tigers are great to work with and I'm getting used to using just one arm now," Trevor Baite, a secret trainer told us.

I'd like to know if the cats and dogs will get on? Only time will tell.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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