Written by Stephen Prime
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Monday, 7 November 2011

image for Benefit cuts to be slashed and then tripled

UK Government plans to slash benefits and then re-assess (with added leniency)

Hard hitting government think tank "Chav Tolchock" has put pressure on government to rethink the way benefits are run in the country. People who claim to be unable to work will be forced to prove it by having to get out of bed once a week to sign the same silly form they signed last week. Anybody unable or unwilling to do so proves they are capable of more taxing tasks thus capable of work.

However, as this harsh law goes into the commons for tax-payers' to pay for negotiations, another hard hitting government think-tank "blur's 14th album" comes into effect, which automatically vitos any anti-chave measures with the motto "there's no other way, there's no other way, all that you can do is watch them play (XBox)" which was also the same anthem used by the 1991 Think-Tank "leisure".

Either way, it seems that due to government wishy washy stance, not much will be done about it either way until we all face the music and admit "it really really really could happen."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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