Written by Eurocleese De Zouch
Print this
Topics: Art

Monday, 24 October 2011

Famous Swedish Painter Lloyd van Oobstratten was videoed ejaculating numerous objects, whilst visiting the infamous Edwardian Obelisk, just outside the Welsh capital, Rhyl.

Onlookers reported that Mr van Oobstratten had started to parade around the Obelisk at around 2.30pm on Sunday afternoon. He then apparently started to howl, and immediately pulled his trousers down. He asked a mother of three (who wants to remain anonymous) whether he could hold on to her, otherwise he may collapse.

Thirty seconds later, the howling got louder, until one final gasp caused the award winning Painter to ejaculate a complete sesame seed loaf of bread. The audible pain continued, and two minutes later, he produced a Puffin from his scrotum. For the next three hours, various objects were released from his loins, including a picture of a Pigeon, a wooden leg, a yawning photo of Busta Rhymes, and numerous pieces of hand carved cutlery.

Debbie Oswald, Coffin maker and part-time mime artist who retrieves the sign language for the local 'paper, The Rhyl Umlaut, said "I was transfixed by his groin for the full three hours. It was a magnificent sight. I want him to bear my children."

Make Eurocleese De Zouch's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 multiplied by 4?

4 20 12 17
53 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more