Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Manchester

Sunday, 23 October 2011

image for Manchester - City Of Zombies And Berserkers
SEX! - Or Was It SIX! Reports Are Sketchy...

Any sceptics out there who doubt the existence of supernatural phenomena need only visit Manchester this evening. The supernatural hotspot city, renowned for voodoo, black magick, gypsy curses and occasionally football, is jumping with supernatural hordes.

Tens of thousands of undead zombies have been sighted around Stretford, Trafford, and Salford. Easily identifiable by their red shirts, vacant stares, and shell-shocked demeanour, the undead have been shuffling aimlessly around town for several hours.

Sightings of the undead have been recorded migrating from the epicentre, and have been logged as far away as Wythenshawe, Bury, Eccles, and South Kensington.

The authorities issued a warning to the public not to approach the zombies, are they are likely to bite, without provocation.

In town, and in particularly the inner city areas to the south and east, Beserkers have been observed emerging from dwellings and going - for want of a better word - berserk.

The Beserkers, usually clad in sky blue or black and red stripes have an air of hysteria and vaguely suppressed insanity about them. Many of them are demanding SEX! - or it could be SIX! - reports are a little sketchy at the moment.

One thing is for certain, and that is that Manchester is a city in fear tonight.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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