Written by Jean Le Fete
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Sunday, 13 November 2011

image for Tooth Fairy Sues Omega Auction House for Sale of John Lennon's Tooth!
The Tooth Fairy's John Lennon Collection

London - In court in London today the Tooth Fairy filed a lawsuit against Omega Auction house for selling a tooth belonging to the late John Lennon.

"This tooth was never properly put under a pillow for me to take by Mr. Lennon,therefore I should have been given first opportunity to have the tooth at the normal price of 5 pence." said the Tooth Fair via Skype, "This just isn't Cricket!"

The tooth in question sold for 19,500 pounds or U.S. $31,200 to a Canadian dentist, who would only speak through his barrister John Cheese, "My client is dumbfounded by this lawsuit, but you should know of course there is a long running feud between the International Tooth Fairy Union and Dentists in general. They have never accepted the difference between a child naturally losing a tooth and an adult having one extracted."

Lennon allegedly gave the tooth to Dorothy "Dot" Jarlett, his housekeeper, to give to her son, back in the 1960s. Her son became a rocker himself and use the tooth as a guitar pick for many years.

"It was better than a regular pick," he said, "Then of course I could always say that John Lennon helped me with this song or that song. Great fer audiences yer know."

"This is totally unfair," said the Tooth Fairy, "We lose thousands upon thousands of teeth each year to greedy dentist! I have an almost complete set of John's teeth, this would have helped a great deal."

Yoko Ono refused to comment, but issued a statement, which is very much the same as a comment, "John was always good to the tooth fairy, he always put piece of chocolate under his pillow along with his tooth, so I don't think they really have much to complain about."

The lawsuit is still pending in Lambeth County Court Number 241.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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