Written by Rebel Not Taken
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Saturday, 24 September 2011

image for Acton man blames Einstein for parking ticket
Acton electrician Terry Scrote.

Acton electrician Terry Scrote has blamed celebrated genius Albert Einstein for a fixed penalty notice he received whilst parked outside a greasy spoon.

"I popped in for a £4-95 all day breakfast with extra bubble, and got involved in a barney with Arthur Saveloy about Einstein's 1905 theory of special relativity. As a result i was a couple of minutes over on the meter" claimed Scrote in his written appeal.

Self employed Scrote insisted that Saveloy was disrespecting Einstein after reading a story in The Sun about an international team of experts who have recorded sub-atomic particles called neutrinos travelling fractionally faster than light.

"I told Saveloy that most of the stories written in The Sun were made up lies but the bell-end carried on mugging Einstein off and called him a foreign wanker" wrote Scrote.

According to a passing pensioner, the discussion between Scrote and Saveloy "turned lively and spilled out onto the street", with the traffic warden who had ticketed the electrician's white van also getting embroiled in the mass debate.

"The sparky and his pikey mate threatened to wire the traffic warden's Niagaras up with electrodes and punch his lights out" claimed retired QPR supporter Len Drivel.

Shocked Ealing Council Parking Officer Eric Nonce admitted in his notes that he was swayed by Scrote's argument.

"The speed of light is a 'cosmic constant'-it is a cornerstone of physics" wrote Nonce after agreeing he may have been theoretically wrong in issuing the £30 ticket.

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