Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Topics: Food, TV Chefs, waste

Tuesday, 20 September 2011

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Mrs Spool, at number 33.

Endless series of TV chef programmes urging people to cook fresh meals from scratch may be contributing to Britain's 8.3 million-ton household food waste problem.

Research suggests that as fresh food has a shorter shelf-life than processed ingredients, families are probably throwing more of it away.

The report, by the Sustainable Consumption Unit, adds that consumers were more likely to order a takeaway than use up healthy leftovers.

EIF News & Features cookery correspondent, Felicity Scotch-Bonnet, said: "I have never heard such a load of tosh in all my born days.

"I'll tell you how these so-called celebrity chefs cause waste - no-one can cook their recipes, that's how! You know how to roast a chicken, because your mother showed you - but when you try to do it like some berk on the telly, it all goes tits-up and you end up throwing the whole lot away!

"Get them off the box, I say!"

Mrs Nuala Spools, at number 33, agreed, adding that she no longer tries TV recipes: "Oh no, dear, not with my brood - they and Mr Spools won't touch anything that's not out of a packet or a tin.

"I've tried - believe me, I've tried. But what can one woman do," she sobbed.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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