Written by Lyndon
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Friday, 19 August 2011

image for Tiger Woods searches for new caddie with good assets
How long can Tiger skirt the issue?

AKRON, Ohio--Tiger Woods has fueled yet another media firestorm, and this time it centers on his firing of longtime caddie Steve Williams. The question on all golf-minded minds: whom will Tiger choose to replace Williams?

Although some believe Tiger will give experienced caddie Fanny Sunesson the nod, Tiger's recent history would suggest a severe change from the status quo.

ABC commentator, Bryon Longhurst: "Tiger needs someone with a good pussy cat-like reflex helping him to take quick action. He doesn't want to have to do all the thinking or all the work."

"A caddie who can lead a golfer down the path he wants to go," said NBC frontman Johnny Hicks, "without him having to spell it out--that's a good, tight asset to have on the green."

Experts from across the Atlantic were quick to weigh in. The BBC's Tony Cotter commenting at a benefit luncheon in Sutton (Surrey): "Especially when a golfer is having a poor day, it's of the utmost importance to be able to go down on his level and ease his pain. An excellent caddie can do this."

Other qualities identified as a essential pieces in Tiger Woods' puzzle: someone who keeps a leg up on the competition, doesn't have chapped palms, and helps Tiger to stay abreast of any new tools and toys of the trade.

Make Lyndon's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 5 multiplied by 1?

6 21 14 5
66 readers are online right now!

Go to top