Written by Rebel Not Taken
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Monday, 15 August 2011

image for QPR loss leaves Bernie Ecclestone a bit short
QPR changes hands.

QPR's strategic 4-0 home defeat to a poor Bolton team has left penny pinching QPR owner Bernie Ecclestone feeling hard done by.

Billionaire Bernie's hopes of trousering 100million quid by flogging QPR to Lotus owning Tony Fernandes have been diminished after the West London side were outplayed by a bunch of hapless donkeys.

"Those dirty northern bastards cost me 20 million quid" said Bernie to suntanned business partner Flavio Briatore.

Prospective QPR buyer Tony Fernandes, who grew up above a fish and chip shop in the Uxbridge Road, famously became a multi millionaire after picking up no frills budget airline Air Asia for only £1.

Shrewd punter Fernandes has been waiting in the wings at Loftus Road and watched the normally rock solid QPR score two 'own goals' and lose to obviously inferior opposition on saturday.

But a tactically well worked defeat on the pitch could mean money in the bank for cash strapped QPR manager Neil Warnock, who had been given a war chest of only £1-25p by Bernie Ecclestone to spend on new players after being promoted to the Premier League.

Ecclestone stated that the initial offer by Fernandes of £1 for all of his shares in QPR was "unacceptable" and that the club was "not for sale."

But after Saturday's debacle, rumours are circulating Shepherd's Bush that Bernie is now prepared to "let QPR go for a cut price 80 million quid."

With the gap narrowing between Bernie's valuation of 100 million quid and Fernandes' 'final offer' of £1, long suffering QPR fans are hoping a 'done deal' is nailed on.

Manager Neil Warnock, who has been promised a 10 million quid windfall by Fernandes if the bid is accepted, has hinted that he will stick to the same formation and make no changes for Saturday's difficult away trip to Everton:

"Another heavy defeat would not be the end of the world" said the canny Warnock.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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