Written by Jaggedone
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Wednesday, 3 August 2011

image for Sir Alex Ferguson denies Sneijder contact again and again, he's "double Dutch!"
Maybe we'll even see Yolanthe's best side off!

The on-going saga between Manchester United and Wesley Sneijder is driving Man U nuts and proves once and for all Sir Alex is actually "Double Dutch!"

Although Wesley is in China with his team, Inter Milan, there are confident rumours that he has a contract in his back pocket and only has to say, "Ja Mijnheer," to Sir Alex.

But once again last night after United's drubbing by Marseille, Sir Alex denied any contact at all and even said he's not interested in the Dutchman, very "double Dutch."

United fans can't wait for Wesley to sign for their team and are already planning a very bright "Oranje" welcome for one of the best players on the planet.

If and when he does arrive the fans have promised to paint not only their faces orange, but also Old Trafford will be a sea of orange just like at the Dutch national team games.

In fact, Sneijder could end up being the most famous Dutchman to set foot on England's green and promised land after William van Oranje conquered the place centuries ago. (sorry Edwin and Ruud, you weren't in the same league as far as showbiz goes and Nike know it (?))

In Holland everbody hopes that Wesley will sign for the "Reds" too because his wife, Yolanthe, a tasty bit of Dutch crumpet, will give "The Current Bun" (and others) so much to write about they'll even forget Posh Becks, whose pretty boring anyway!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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