Written by mikewadestr
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Tuesday, 12 July 2011

image for Fan who Caught Jeter's Milestone hit and Jeter were Little League Teammates
Oh boy! He's got his head stuck in the pitching machine again!

As it turns out, the guy who caught Derek Jeter's Milestone hit and Derek Jeter had actually played on the same little league team when they were kids.

The team was coached by Jerry Gassed, who always claimed that the funny smelling liquid in his drinking cup was just Gatorade mixed with soda. He, also, had one of those slurry Texity accents that he claimed made his breath smell funny, along with a constant inner ear infection that often caused him to occasionally stumble and fall down.

Jerry Gassed made his living working full time as a speech therapist and part time as a bomb defuser for the Kalamazoo City Police Department.

The name of the little league team was The Little Bastards. The coach chose the team name because there already was a team named The Little Mother Fuckers.

When Jeter was asked if he remembered the guy who caught Derek Jeter's Milestone hit from his days playing on The Little Bastards, Jeter responded:

"Geez, I hated that team. All the players were bastards".

"The only thing I remember is the coach constantly giving hitting and fielding instructions to our moms because he was too drunk to see us. Apparently, every time coach would look down at us he would fall over. So he coached our moms instead".

"I've got to admit that at the end of the year our moms ended up being pretty awesome players. Unfortunately, us kids really sucked".

"Oh yeah", continued Jeter. "There was a guy who always got his head stuck in the pitching machine. None of us ever knew the guy's name so we just called him, the guy who always got his head stuck in the pitching machine. Other than that, the team was a complete wash".

When asked if he was the guy who always got his head stuck in the pitching machine on Derek Jeter's little league team, the guy who caught Derek Jeter's Milestone hit happily responded:

"Yep that was me alright!"

"You know something? I am much happier being known as the guy who caught Derek Jeter's Milestone hit instead of the guy who always got his head stuck in the pitching machine.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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