Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 26 June 2011

image for The Minnesota Timberwolves 21-Year-Old Draft Pick Tanguy Ngombo Is Actually 37!
A photo of Tanguy Ogombo's pet elephant "Snowflake" which he named after Sarah Palin.

MINNEAPOLIS - Needless to say the executives with the Minnesota Timbervolves are not very happy campers at the moment.

They have been duped and duped good as Heidi "The Plastic Woman" Montag is always saying.

It seems that when the Timberwolves picked Tanguy Ngombo as their 58th overall draft pick they thought that they were getting a 21-year-old rookie player who this year started playing in Africa's Animal Kingdom Basketball League (AKBL).

But it now turns out that a highly reliable, inside, unnamed source has informed Sports Territory's Tango Brisket that Ngombo is actually a 37-year-old, 5 foot 2 inch tall, 103 pound point guard who has played for the Bootyburg Poison Darters of the AKBL for 21 years.

Brisket stated that Minnesota's general manager David "Eagle Eye" Kahn somehow failed to do the needed research on Mr. Ngombo.

The reporter for Sports Territory stated that a red flag should have gone up in Kahn's face when Ngombo mistakenly listed that his hometown was Blingburg, Buffaranda and not his actual hometown of Bootyville, Lower Zamgola.

Kahn admitted that when it comes to geography he is about as dumb as Sarah "Snowflake" Palin.

Brisket added that if the T-Wolves would have done their homework they would have found out that Ngombo missed the entire 2008 season due to lion bites to his hands, arms, ankles, and ears that he received during a picnic outing held on Lower Zamgola's Zebra Mating Day Celebration.

He noted that they would have also learned that he had a slight limp which he got from a spear injury to his right foot during a hippo hunting accident back on Friday, September 13, 2002.

Tango Brisket says that the Minnesota Timberwolves are now faced with two options. One they can have Tanguy Ogombo arrested and fine him what amounts to an embarrassment fine of $70,000 or they can have him deported back to his hometown of Bootyville, Lower Zamgola.

The Timberwolves have decided to ship his lying ass back to Africa as fast as they possibly can and hope that the basketball sports writers, players, and fans forget about how silly the organization was made to look.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Tisk-Tisk...]

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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