Written by ExiledRoyal
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Saturday, 11 June 2011

image for Tracker found down John Terry's pants
Terry's pants are the centre of attention

Following revelations that England Football Captain and Chelsea defender John Terry had a tracker planted under his car, further investigations have discovered that he also had a tracker planted in the Y of his Y-fronts.

His lawyer Nick "Mr. Loophole" Freeman stated that whereas the car bug was clearly planted by Paparazzi it was less clear who was responsible for the underwear device.

Top of the suspects is Ryan Giggs. John Terry said that the Welsh Wizard was more than likely to keep an eye on his own philandering as it would give Giggs a head start in finding loose women for his own gratification.

Secondly his own wife Toni is in the frame. "For some reason she has a problem believing me any more," Terry told us. "And she has full and free access to my pants. Although, having said that, so do a number of other 'special' friends."

After being removed from Mr. Terry's Jockeys the bug was treated with disinfectant and taken away for examination.

In tomorrow's issue: Ashley Cole - How I found a CCTV Camera hidden in my bum-crack.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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