Written by Rebel Not Taken
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Friday, 3 June 2011

image for Andy Murray 'Fuck Off' shock
Wimbledon Centre Court

Grumpy Scottish tennis player Andy Murrray is really pissed off now.

Ex 'Brat' and Grand Slam champion, John McEnroe has told reporters that Murray's swearing needs a complete overhaul:

"Andy showed a lot of early promise but he needs to improve his swearing on all surfaces".

The moody Jock, who has parted company with his Russian coach U Fukov, is hoping the gobby New Yorker will help him 'kick ass'.

McEnroe has told Murray to study the swearing of Nobu cupboard nobbing Kraut Boris Becker:

"Other players couldn't handle Boris when he used the word 'Scheiser'. It was a massive weapon and his opponents had no answer to it"

Murray has reached the later stages of tournaments with a limited range of swearing but 'Fuck Off' and the single expletive 'Fuck' are not considered enough to win him Grand Slams.

Roger Federer, probably the most underrated swearer of all time, can swear in several languages and also uses heavily disguised swearing which his opponents have trouble picking.

Virginia Wade, a big admirer of Federer's technique, agrees:

"Roger swears so effortlessly and has such a languid and elegant way with words.
It is almost as if he is not swearing at all"

Many Ex players also feel that Murray is unable to 'let rip' with his mother watching all the time.

But 'Tiger' Tim Henman is backing Andy Murray:

"I know the pressure Andy is under. I had my mum and dad and also my pregnant wife watching. I had to swear under my breath and often lost to people less well spoken than me"

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