Written by Rebel Not Taken
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Sunday, 29 May 2011

image for Abramovich exposed as Cockney con man
Mr and Mrs Abramovitch

Rumours are spreading round the manor that Russian oligarch Roman Abramovich is a Sexton Blake.

A snake at The Cash In Claw pub has coughed that the nonce's real moniker is Manny 'Rough' Diamond, a con man who operates from a lock up in Shepherd's Bush.

Mr Diamond, who claims to have been educated at Eton, has done several stretches of bird in the Scrubs and has bundles of previous mugging Billies off.

The hapless pond life down at Chelsea are 'Rough' Diamond's most recent patsies.

Posing as a rich village idiot, Roman aka Manny, has been rinsing the hot dog stands for years and lining his sky rockets with the lemon dash.

The local filth are keen to bunny with the bogus Russki and have raided his lock up in the Goldhawk Road.

But a regular drinker at The Queen's Legs has told insiders that Manny had done a runner.

"i sussed he was Duke of Kent from day one"

Manny's accountant David Yom Kippur had gone to see a 'man about a dog'and has also had it away on his toes.

Debenture holder Rich Idiot has told fans that the jackanory is "utter rubbish"

But a face at The Behemoth Arms has told us:

"That Forby will be brown bread when I get my Germans on him".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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