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Friday, 27 May 2011

image for Hleb joins the Stone Roses and selects himself for champions league final
2011 Stepping stone champion, Alexander Hleb

Arsenal, Barcelona, Stuttgart, Birmingham FC the list goes on for Footballing vagabond Alexander Hleb.

The Belarusian midfielder (whose mother was a builder) has been jumping ship ever since leaving the gunners with his pathetic excuse that London was too noisy!

After helping Birmingham get relegated Hleb is weighing up his Job options.

Realising that he was Still on the Barca books Hleb has admitted that he is available for selection for the Champions League final this weekend.

When asked about this surprising notation, he said "I'm still a Barca player and I will be at hanging at Wembley when the team arrives to check in with Pep, I've still got my old Barca shirt, I only have some Stuttgart socks Birmingham FC shorts to wear, but I'm ready to go!"

Pep Guardiola stated on hearing this, "Ryan Giggs has more chance of signing up for twitter, than that muppet playing in this game??"

If not selected, the other option on the cards is for a career change and believe it or not, join the manc indy band 'The Stone Roses'.

Due to his drawn likeness to the macunian Ian Brown, Hleb has been offered a contact to stand in for front man when Brown is too blarted to perform.

Ian Brown could only comment saying "If Lexxie can 'andle his draw and get leathered with the boys, everything's going to be proper sorted like, but if he gets out of hand and gets all bluudy mard on us, he's gonna get a dry slap and banged out like a gooden!"

What's next for the 2011 Stepping stone champion, Alexander Hleb?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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