Written by Monkey Woods
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Tuesday, 24 May 2011

image for Ryan Giggs Not 'That Nice Young Lad' Anymore
Sex: nice young lads don't indulge in it

Ryan Giggs, the Manchester United midfielder currently embroiled in a Twitter scandal, today hit the front pages of every newspaper in Britain, and has been dumped by mothers and housewives everywhere, who no longer refer to him as 'that nice young lad'.

Giggs, 37, has been through the courts to try to protect his reputation as 'that nice young lad' and to stop newspapers and other media from printing or publishing his name in connection with allegations of a fully-grown woman to whom he is not married.

Apparently, this has not worked.

And why should it?

Now, however, Giggs' real problems have started, as millions of housewives and 'mothers of young men just like him' have thrown down their aprons and sweeping brushes to demonstrate against his alleged 'typically manlike' actions.

One said:

"I thought he was 'that nice young lad' off the football on the telly, but he's turned out just like the rest of them. I blame that Sir Alex."

Sir Alex Ferguson was quick to reply to the comment, saying:

"Ryan Giggs is a smashing young lad, but there has always been an awful lot of pressure on him, and now that his balls have dropped, it's probably the right time to stop referring to him as 'that nice young lad', even if he is a lovely boy. Now fuck off."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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