Written by Rebel Not Taken
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Wednesday, 18 May 2011

image for Arsene Wenger to play Basil Fawlty
Cesc 'Manuel' Fabregas

Arsene Wenger is being tipped to play Basil Fawlty in the remake of the classic comedy Fawlty Towers.

The Arsenal manager has just recovered from a quadruple bypass and is rumoured to be seeking a stress free lifestyle.

The lanky Frenchman has bought a bungalow in Torquay.

Local resident Edna Welthorpe told us "His legs got tangled up in a deckchair. He is not all there."

Wenger denies being approached to star as Basil Fawlty, but he did admit to being a fan of Jacques Tati and told reporters he was in Torquay "By mistake."

Theatrical sources can confirm that Wenger has long been a disciple of the Stanislavski school of method acting.

Wenger's assistant Pat Rice added his weight to the speculation: "The gaffer is different class. His Basil impersonations have us in stitches in the dug out"

Arsene Fawlty is hoping to bring Cesc Fabregas in to portray hapless waiter Manuel.

The short Spaniard has not commented on this transfer, fuelling speculation that he wants to return to Barcelona.

Our sources claim that if talks do break down on Arsene Towers, the Frenchman may instead be offered the part of Inspector Blakey in a remake of On The Buses.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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