Written by Skoob1999
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Sunday, 8 May 2011

image for Are You Watching Merseyside? - United Close In On Title Number 19
Off The Perch At Last!

It was billed as 'The Clash Of The Titans' and Chelsea's titans were left reeling as Javier "Chicharito" Hernandez scored in the first minute, latching onto a slide-rule pass from Ji Sung Park and coolly side-footing the ball home past a flailing Petr Cech to put United a goal ahead.

"Are you watching Merseyside?" resounded from the packed Old Trafford stands.

To the tune of Welsh anthem 'Bread Of Heaven.'

From that point onwards, things just got better and better for the Mancunian outfit as Nemanja Vidic nodded home a Ryan Giggs cross.

It wasn't all one way traffic, a string of good saves from Van Der Sar thwarting the Chelsea strike force, but United could have had half a dozen by half time. Only the excellent Cech prevented that from happening with a series of stunning saves of his own, most notably from a goalbound Rooney attempt.

2-0 at half time, with referee Howard Webb kept occupied by a series of niggly fouls and having to wave his yellow card about quite a bit.

Ivanovic denied being a "dirty bastard" and insisted that he was simply doing his job.

Getting in people's way and kicking them.

Liverpool fans must have hoped that Anfield old boy, Fernando Torres would do them a favour when he was introduced as a substitute on the hour.

To prevent United overhauling Liverpool's 18 League titles, and kind of knocking King Kenny off his perch.

But it was Lampard who pulled a goal back for Chelsea on 68 minutes.

Good ole Frank.

It made no difference in the end.

With veteran midfield maestro Ryan Giggs conducting the red orchestra, United kind of knew the score.

It was 2-1

Unbiased coverage provided by Skoob Sports News.

Are you watching Merseyside?

Just askin'

More as we get it. Probably on number 20. Not the bus...

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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