Written by Smidy
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Topics: Wednesday

Monday, 13 October 2003

image for Brett Kimmorley unhappy with own selection in Test team
Unpopular Australian Halfback Brett Kimmorley

Wednesday October 13th 2003

In Rugby League news today Brett Kimmorley expressed great dissapointment upon discovering that he was selected as Australia's halfback for their upcoming test against New Zealand. Speaking from the back of the team's bus, where he was sitting alone, Kimmorley said:

"Mate, I'm as shocked as you are. I figured that the ARL (Australian Rugby League) must have just brought me over for a bit of a free holiday, I didn't expect to be actually playing. I guess they must be sick of winning or something, thats the only logical conclusion I can come to".

Teammates today were also in stunned disbelief at the disastrous selection, captain Darren Lockyer being quoted as saying:

"Great, my first ever game as captain of my country and they put Noddy at halfback, its like they want the team to lose.... Just quietly I'd be seeing what odds New Zealand are paying for the win, maybe this is how the ARL hopes to pay for all that bullcrap they put on before the grand final.... I mean that Chick from American Idle or whatever she was.... What a crock".

As of yet no members of the team have been brave enough to suggest that Kimmorley's selection may be due to sexual favours he may or may not have performed on coach Chris Anderson.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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