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Thursday, 28 April 2011

image for United Want Gerard Piquet Back Because Giggsy Fancies Shakira
The Bonkettes - Currently 'Seeing To' The Da Silva Twins, Fabio And Rafael. Allegedly.

According to the legendary Manchester rumour mill, Sir Alex Ferguson is preparing to swoop on Barcelona, in order to get Gerard Piquet back to Old Trafford, because United legend, Ryan Giggs allegedly thinks Piquet's girlfriend - diminutive Colombian diva, Shakira - is a bit of all right.

Although Giggs is a happily married and devout family man, the rumour mill suggests that he isn't totally averse to having a bit of hot Latina totty mooching around the player's lounge after matches.

Giggs - or Giggsy as he is more popularly known - has a bit of a track record when it comes to dating blondes, having once been intimately linked with posh croaky voiced TV presenter Dani Behr.

However, insiders say that 'Giggsy' isn't altogether enamoured with Shakira, but has stated privately that he wouldn't mind 'putting a ring' on Beyonce. Metaphorically speaking.

Javier Hernandez - Chicharito - apparently declared that both foxy vixens were waaaay too old for him to declare even a passing interest.

Some sources are even going as far as to suggest that 'Giggsy' doesn't really want Piquet back at Old Trafford, because Piquet has 'a bit of a beard' and 'Giggsy' doesn't want his designer stubble to be overshadowed.

Sir Alex Ferguson described the rumours as "Complete and utter bollocks."

More when the drugs wear off.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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