Written by Skoob1999
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Tuesday, 12 April 2011

image for Chicharito Leaves Chelsea In Tatters
Carlo Ancelotti Ponders His Future As Chelsea's Season Crashes Around Their Ears.

Chelsea's season ended ignominiously here at Old Trafford tonight, at the precise moment that Javier Hernandez, aka Chicharito pounced onto a Ryan Giggs cross to score as half-time loomed in the Champions League quarter final second leg.

That goal made the aggregate score 2-0 to Manchester United, and from that point onwards Chelsea were metaphorically speaking, dead men walking.

£50 million blank-firing striker, Fernando Torres made it eleven games without a goal and was substituted at half time in favour of Didier Drogba, but a red card in the second half for Ramires virtually made it 'Mission Impossible' for the West London fancy dans.

Even when Drogba equalised on the night, United bounced right back, 21 seconds later, as the elder statesman Ryan Giggs released Park, who drove the ball low past Cech for 2-1 on the night and 3-1 on aggregate.

And my oh my, how the raucous Manchester crowd rubbed salt into the wound, taunting Ashley Cole with a sustained chant of "Where's your Missus gone?" to the tune of 'Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep' by sixties combo Middle Of The Road.

And Carlo Ancelotti, with a rip roaring rendition of "You're Getting Sacked In The Morning" to the tune of Juan Tana Mera.

Ironically, it was wayward, shaven headed, Scouse striker Wayne Rooney who almost had the last laugh as he attempted to lob the ball over Cech's head in the dying seconds from the half way line. Cech managed to recover, and thwart the impudent goal attempt, sparing some embarrassing blushes, from the man who - unusually - was the epitome of controlled discipline for Manchester United.

It seems the season is over for Chelsea and Carlo Ancelotti, which will not please sullen faced multi-billionaire Roman Abramovich.

Expect heads to roll down at the Bridge in forthcoming days.

The likely scenario is that Manchester United will face Schalke in the semi-finals. United fans are advised not to mention the war.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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