Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Sunday, 27 March 2011

image for Wales 0 - England 2: Sports Hack Nearly Laughs Into Accident
Boohed by the Welsh.

A top sports journalist narrowly avoided a serious accident yesterday after covering the Wales-England Euro qualifier at the Millennium Stadium in Cardiff.

EIF News & Features sports editor, Thelonious Adidas, was driving home on the M4 after watching England win the tie 2-0 with goals by Frank Lampard and Darren Bent.

"I'd just crossed the Severn Bridge and I was having difficulty trying not to laugh," said Adidas.

"But I'm afraid the guffaws got the better of me and I just let go for a few seconds. Then I sort of came round and saw to my horror that I had swerved to within inches of a huge lorry - one of those Dutch flower jobs.

"Well that brought me up short, I can tell you. I pulled into the services and stayed in a hotel room overnight.

"But it was funny, wasn't it? I mean the way those Taffs boohed the National Anthem, boohed John Terry every time he touched the ball...

"We scored twice in the first 15 minutes - I nearly doubled up then, but managed to control myself, but all the lads on the press box were struggling.

"Then the sheep-shaggers boohed when the England fans struck up with God Save The Queen during the match.

"And that twat Craig Bellamy running around like a fart in a collander trying to show how much he hates the English. Hilarious! Oh wonderful! Stop it, please... it hurts."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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