Written by Gail Farrelly
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Tuesday, 22 March 2011

image for NY Mets May Get Flower Guy as Investor
It's flower power!

Yep, that's right. The latest word is that there are a number of possible bidders with an interest in buying a minority stake in the NY Mets. Among them is James F. McCann, Chairman, CEO and founder of the well-known U.S. corporation, 1-800-Flowers.

And if he buys in, rumor has it that there'll be some changes made in the club, the first of which states that any player who hits a home run will be presented with a big bouquet of flowers at home plate.

At Mets victory celebrations, there will still be champagne, but there will also be -- you guessed it -- flowers and more flowers! The manager will no longer be dunked in champagne. No, siree. Instead, a garland of flowers will be draped around his neck. You know, sort of like what the winning horse at the Kentucky Derby gets.

In addition to being sent down to the minor leagues, players who aren't doing well will have to serve a stint in flower delivery services. This public relations move should be a boost to the Citi Field ticket office.

The Mets version of that wonderful song "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" (words by Jack Norworth; lyrics by Albert Von Tilzer) will be a little different than the original. The third line will now go: "Buy me some flowers and Cracker Jack."

Most important, "Play it with Flowers" will become the team's official slogan.

Amazin' isn't it?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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