Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 11 March 2011

image for Manchester United's Chicharito Goes Fishing Up In Wales and Returns With A 70-Pound Goldfish
A picture which Chicharito drew of fellow teammate Anders Lindegaard (#34).

MANCHESTER - It has not been a good week for the Red Devils of Manchester United as Sir Alex Ferguson's team lost to rivals Chelsea and Liverpool.

The team from Manchester managed to score only one goal in each of the two games.

One of the star players Javier Hernandez Balcazar, better known as Chicharito decided to take a break and flew over to Cardigan Bay, Wales to do some fishing.

Since his girlfriend the fiery belly-dancing songstress Shakira was visiting relatives in Colombia he figured it would be good for him to get away and collect his thoughts in preparation for upcoming games against Arsenal, Olympique de Marseille, and Bolton.

Chicharito rented a small fishing boat The Dylan Thomas IV and set out on the Irish Sea. The first day out the only thing he caught was a one pound tuna, and a half-pound guppy. He threw both back into the sea.

He did see several dolphins, a hammerhead shark, and a weird looking creature that he said looked as if it could be related to the famed Loch Ness Monster, or at the very least to X-Factor judge Louis Walsh.

Chicharito missed Shakira so much that he decided to text her from the high seas. He asked her what she was wearing. She told him that she was naked.

He asked her why and she replied because she was in the middle of taking a bubble bath. Javier then texted her a line that was somewhere along the line of what Prince Charles had once told Camilla.

But the word that Prince Charles used is so offensive that I cannot even type the word but it begins with the letter "T."

Chicharito, after telling Shakira that he had just caught a 70-pound goldfish, remarked that he wishes that he was one of the bubbles.

The British news program 'Tickety Boo News' recently named Chicarito and Shakira as being "The Happiest Non-British Couple In The Entire United Kingdom."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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