Written by grimbo
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Wednesday, 23 February 2011

image for Award for Dundee United

In the wake of their 2010 Active Nation Cup Final victory over Ross County yesterday, Dundee United have carried off yet another trophy.

In an online poll of Internet Explorer users , the Arabs have also been given the dubious accolade of Winners of The Worst Cup Final of the Last 50 Years.

The Tannadice outfit fought off stiff competition from, amongst others, the Steaua Bucharest v Barcelona European Cup Final in 1986 (which the Romanian outfit won on penalties after a 0-0 Draw) and the Man Utd-Liverpool FA Cup Final of 1996 (won 1-0 by Man U with a late Cantona strike).

The combination of Utd's long ball game, and Ross County's total inability to create anything remotely resembling a scoring chance over the whole 90 minutes, saw the SPL side win 85 % of all votes cast.

From the team's base at their bed and breakfast as they prepared for last night's game with St. Johnstone, a delighted Peter Houston said "The result was a total vindication of our tactics. I'm proud that I've been able to keep the side playing in the style Craig Levein introduced with such success. Results are everything in the game these days. "

A source at Oxford University Press excitedly revealed "....after many decades of searching, my colleagues and my good self are confident that 'watching the Arabs' will soon be firmly established in the canon of the English language as a viable, nay even popular alternative to the over used 'watching paint dry' and may even replace 'watching a panda sleep' as the global expression for jaw dropping boredom".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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